"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do." -Eleanor Roosevelt
I have been thinking about fear lately. What am I afraid of? Why am I afraid? When have I conquered my fears? This morning I decided to write down my answers to these questions. As much as I hate to admit it, I am afraid of what other people think of me. I am afraid of looking bad, stupid, hypocritical, weird. I am afraid of being uncomfortable, not having control, afraid of quitting or failing. I am afraid of being trapped in something I don't want to do, and not knowing the outcome of things. I am afraid of pain.
Why am I afraid of these things? I am sure my fears are common fears, but why do I let fear have its place? I think because it protects me... or gives the illusion that it does. It keeps me where I am comfortable. As long as I don't let myself encounter my fears... in other words, take risks... then I can stay safe. On the other hand, the fear robs me of things that could be... dreams fulfilled, joys experienced, friends made, goals met. Are these things worth the discomfort, failure, and pain that comes along with them? I want to say yes.
Then I started to think about times when I have faced my fears... times when I have been brave. This was hard. I thought about starting new jobs, which I have done my fair share of over the last four years. I thought about confronting my dad about his alcohol addiction, and about doing hard workouts at CrossFit. I thought about flying. I hate flying, but I love to travel and I want to see more of the world. T
his led me to think about the cost of fear. If I had let my fear of flying have the upper hand in past, then I would not have seen the Eiffel Tower, or helped build a home in Guatemala, lived in Thailand, or witnessed freedom and healing in India... experiences that I wold not trade for anything.Though, despite what I know is true, it is still hard to let go of my control and comfort. I hope to become a person who chooses to live in faith more than in fear. I don't want to miss out or live in regret.
"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live." -Dorothy Thompson
1 comment:
It occurred to me this morning that the scriptures tell us not to fear because the only one who has a legitimate reason to be afraid is Satan. Every time we choose to be afraid we identify with his condemnation.
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